Dinner At The Homesick Restaurant by Anne Tyler

“How pointless real life was! In novels, events led up to something,” thought Ezra, as he scanned his mother’s diary.  “What would you say is your patients’ most common disease?” This was what Ezra later asked of his medic sister, Jenny. “Mother-itis,” Jenny replied. Their mother, Pearl, so central to their lives, yet so difficult a project for any of them, passes away to be eulogised at her funeral in a manner that was “so vague, so general, so universally applicable, that Cody thought of that parlour game where people fill in words at random and then giggle hysterically at the story that results.” Cody was another of Pearl’s three children, the first, in fact, and also the most difficult. It was, of course, the children, those that remained after their mother’s death, that were the consequences of the random gap filling that had not even recognised their mother. And then, at the end of Pearl’s funeral service, the minister announced the closing hymn, chosen by Pearl herself. “We’ll Understand It All By And By.” Perhaps she did. Perhaps.

In its quiet, essentially suburban understatement, Anne Tyler’s tale of family life in Dinner At The Homesick Restaurant is nothing less than a masterpiece. As ever with Anne Tyler, the family lives in Baltimore, is not rich, is not particularly poor and presents little that is even potentially memorable. When Pearl and Beck Tull married, they might have anticipated a shared life of convention, an expectation that might have been on the way to fulfilment when three children arrived and the progress of their father in his sales career seemed assured. But then we all take far too much for granted. Beck Tull disappeared, walked out, apparently to pursue his career via a posting that had to take him away from Baltimore. But soon this was an independent life. The letters home became infrequent, the fifty dollars he apologetically generously enclosed less dependable.

Such events might have proved earth shattering if Pearl Tull had not been such an effective, if reluctant pragmatist. For the good of her family, apparently, she made the best of things, created excuses, refused to accept that this was a separation, and chose not to offer an opinion to her children. Such a change thus becomes a different form of convention. These events are set, of course, in the mid-twentieth century and in the United States, where such occurrences were not unknown.

And so Pearl was left to raise three kids. She took a job behind a store counter and walked to work to save on fares. Cody, the eldest of the three, had always been difficult. Ezra was meeker, milder, perhaps prone to naiveté, a quality he never quite managed to grow out of. Jenny was perhaps the most capable, and talented, certainly the most obviously practical of the three. She was motivated to study, to go to medical school and become a doctor. And that is exactly what she did. Ezra took on a restaurant, the eating house of the title, though we are not to conclude that Jenny’s later eating disorders are a result of the unconventional nature of the family menu. Cody became a time and motion man, but a very successful one. He always did seem to have a desire to tell other what they should be doing.

And thus all three of Pearl´s children grow up. They survive because of, rather than in spite of their mother, but the recipients of the love feel things differently. These people live anticipatory lives, their experience of the present dominated by a view of the future as it ought not to be. These people are never “well”, only “pre-ill”. They are never “happy, only “pre-trauma”. They never enter into “marriage”, only “pre-divorce”. And yet illness and trauma only rarely visit their essentially safe lives, though perhaps inevitably divorce is somewhat more common. As adults, they continually reinterpret their past, without ever really either acknowledging it or knowing it.

What happens to these characters is the important and essential content of the book, so a review of Anne Tyler’s Dinner At The Homesick Restaurant must leave all detail to be discovered by the reader. But eventually what happens is far less important than how it happens. The book’s currency is the complexity of the relationships between and amongst these family members. And these inter-relationships, though often both predictable and dysfunctional as well as avoidable are described by Anne Tyler in truly beautiful, economic prose via the shared events of their fictional but illustrative lives.

But it must be recorded that Ezra inherits a restaurant, and several of the family encounters that form the spine of the story take place over the dinner table. Not every dish served up is to everyone’s individual taste, but when did individual preferences count for anything when the collective of family is so strong? Even when superficially it might appear weak… As time passes, it becomes clear that it might not just be the food that might be described as a “concoction” when these family members get together.

Anne Tyler’s genius lies in her ability to make the mundane captivating. These people could live next door. They are not gentry, not celebrities. They are not really achievers and, at least on the face of things, might not possess any feature that might be described as outstanding. But then that is entirely Anne Tyler’s point. They are ordinary people of their time but, as individuals and then because of that collective we label “family”, they are of course unique, And their lives consist of never-to-be-repeated attempts to solve the challenges their unique circumstances generate. They offer no great surprises, no significant crimes, no earth-shattering traumas, and witness no particular history. But their lives continually change, develop, disintegrate, reform and surprise. In Anne Tyler’s work, life itself is the plot and the family is its landscape.